Scientific Gossip (39-3b)
Contains 100% gossip from concentrate
War Game Denial
The US Defense Department plans to dispute a soon-to-be-published report by Plaston University economist Darlene Irons that 42% of the funding for the Strategic Defense Initiative (which was popularly called the “Star Wars” missile defense system) was used to develop video games.
Biting Edge Technology
Progress is being made in the development of dental semiconductors. These compounds are not candidates to supplant conventional dental amalgams. Nevertheless, their speed and optical capabilities are spurring interest from several quarters. Eminento Electronics Corporation has demonstrated a stereo receiver/amplifier (the much-rumored “BiteMan”) that can be mounted inside a living tooth via root canal therapy.
Underfoot Fume Fuss
The US Consumer Product Safety Commission and the Environmental Protection Agency continue to investigate claims that chemical emissions from carpets can cause health problems. Of special concern are 4-phenylcyclohexene and other volatile organic compounds used or formed in the carpet manufacturing process. This biohazard risk may explain why one so seldom sees carpets on laboratory floors.
Patent Yourself
Manfred deLisle, a London patent attorney, is offering to file patent claims for the complete genome of any individual who wishes to “preserve his or her commercial options.” Several hundred people have signed up for deLisle's services. However, it is anticipated that patent officials will impose extensive documentation demands that will render the scheme impractical.
Amici Curiae
Another London attorney, A. C. Pomeroy, is working with representatives of several major religions to file patent claims for the genetic substance deoxyribonucleic acid (DNA), “on behalf of an unspecified deity.” Pomeroy's clients will claim that (a) DNA is a patentable invention and (b) the inventor is unable to file a claim personally and so must have his rights protected by a consortium of interested parties. The parties reportedly have agreed to share any royalties that accrue from the patent, on an equal basis.
Subatomic Homeopathy
Critics of homeopathy have always relied on a devastating argument: that homeopaths dilute their substances with so much water that typically not a single molecule of the original substance remains. Physicians and medical scientists commonly regard homeopaths as well-meaning crackpots. That may soon change, thanks to a theoretical breakthrough by Deborah Linklater, Angus Dalziel, and colleagues at The Center for High Energy Homeopathy, in Glasgow. Linklater and Dalziel say they will soon publish evidence that homeopathic substances are composed entirely of dissociated, medicinal strength quarks, and that this neutralizes the water.
Testing the Limits to Growth
With earth’s population growing by approximately 100 million people per year, some economists argue that “for every new mouth to feed there's a new pair of hands to work out a means of feeding them.” A new experiment will test the theory. Modeled after the Biosphere experiment, the PopuSphere will be a sealed, Plexiglas-enclosed structure located in the Arizona desert. The trial period will begin with a near-theoretical-capacity of 200 individuals, all of prime child-bearing age and possessing firm religious beliefs against contraception. Experimenters will seal the subjects into the PopuSphere next summer, then measure the population twenty years later.
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