PLEASE FORWARD/POST AS APPROPRIATE ================================================================ mini-Annals of Improbable Research ("mini-AIR") Issue Number 2002-12 December, 2002 ISSN 1076-500X Key words: improbable research, science humor, Ig Nobel, AIR, the ---------------------------------------------------------------- A free newsletter of tidbits too tiny to fit in the Annals of Improbable Research (AIR), the journal of inflated research and personalities ================================================================ ----------------------------- 2002-12-01 TABLE OF CONTENTS 2002-12-01 Table of Contents 2002-12-02 Soon... 2002-12-03 What's New in the Magazine 2002-12-04 Luxuriant Flowing Hair News 2002-12-05 Micro-Stardom in Denver 2002-12-06 Pocket-Gopher-Lice Poets 2002-12-07 Oliver and the Elements 2002-12-08 No Words 2002-12-09 The Anguish of Spaghetti, Revisited 2002-12-10 Knotted Anguish 2002-12-11 Shopping and the Brain 2002-12-12 Improbable Science Books 2002-12-13 Sheepish Thermodynamics Limerick Contest 2002-12-14 Season's Watery Greetings 2002-12-15 BURSTS OF HotAIR: Anti-Money Conference, etc. 2002-12-16 RESEARCH SPOTLIGHT: Inevitable Breakthrough 2002-12-17 MAY WE RECOMMEND: Flighty, Hopping and Fick 2002-12-18 AIRhead Events 2002-12-19 How to Subscribe to AIR (*) 2002-12-20 Our Address (*) 2002-12-21 Please Forward/Post This Issue! (*) 2002-12-22 How to Receive mini-AIR, etc. (*) Items marked (*) are reprinted in every issue. mini-AIR is a free monthly *e-supplement* to AIR, the print magazine ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-02 Soon... On TUESDAY, DECEMBER 24, Christmas eve (Tokyo time), watch a special TV documentary about the Ig Nobel Prizes on NHK, Japan's public television network. For details, see Section 2002-12-18 below. ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-03 What's New in the Magazine AIR 8:6 (November/December 2002) is the special ART & SCIENCE ISSUE. It will be emerging from the printers any day now. Highlights include: <> "The Tring Tiles," by Ayers Bagley. A look at one of the most curious -- and curiously overlooked -- exhibits in the British Museum: a set of thirteenth-century tiles from a church in Tring, England. The tiles are believed to depict non-biblical stories about childhood miracles and misadventures of Jesus, but they strongly resemble episodes from the modern cartoon series "South Park." <> "Libretto for 'Il Destino di Grant Application,'" by Lloyd Fricker. The complete partial description of the alleged opera, with newly discovered photographs. <> "The Avian Bombing Target Experiment," by Jeff Van Bueren. The author tested birds' ability to drop their load on a large bullseye. <> "Cosmic Headlights and the Origin of Gamma Ray Bursts," by Eric J. Heller. The author presents an automotive argument to explain a curiously puzzling appearance of intense, very sudden flashes in many parts of the cosmos. <> ... and much, much more... (What you are reading at this moment is mini-AIR, which is just a wee, small, monthly e-mail supplement to the print magazine.) ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-04 Luxuriant Flowing Hair News These are heady times for the Luxuriant Flowing Hair Club for Scientists (LFHCfS). In recent weeks, the club has seen (a) its first resignation due to haircut; and (b) the first simultaneous membership of three Luxuriantly Flowing Tressed Scientific sisters. The Club's home page is, as ever, at ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-05 Micro-Stardom in Denver If you are an accomplished singer and/or pianist, and will be attending the AAAS Annual meeting in Denver, and would like to be part of the AIR show there on Friday night (Valentine's Day), Feb. 14, please get in touch with us ASAP at . Ditto if you are a published AIR author and will be attending the meeting and might like to give a wee, little mini-presentation as part of the show. ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-06 Pocket-Gopher-Lice Poets The judges in the first and last annual POCKET-GOPHER-LICE LIMERICK COMPETITION were heartened to see how many people could not stop themselves from composing limericks that explore the the research report: "Comparative Body Size Relationships in Pocket Gophers and Their Chewing Lice," by Serge Morand, et al., which explained that: Our study of gopher hair-shaft diameter and louse head-groove dimensions suggest that there is a "lock-and-key" relationship between these two anatomical features. [for the full citation, see last month's mini-AIR] The winning poets and limericks are: INVESTIGATOR LEILA Z. HADJ-CHIKH: A louse that could leave like a rocket Stayed put on a Thomomy's pocket. The louse only gripped On gophers equipped With hairs that could fit in its socket. INVESTIGATOR GREG CARTER: Pocket Gopher said, "Isn't that nice? They've been researching my chewing lice, And the width of my hair Doth directly compare With the size of their head-groove device!" INVESTIGATOR JUDITH PHILIP: A louse wanted a chew at a pocket gopher or two. He chose for his host one whose fur was the most fitting. Well, wouldn't you? INVESTIGATOR GARY DRYFOOS: As the hair on our gopher grows thicker So, too, do the lice there that lick 'er. Pocket-gopher/louse teething 's a "lock-and-a-key" thing. The lice just get fatter, and snicker. These and several notable runners-up will be featured later this month on the AIR web site. ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-07 Oliver and the Elements 2002 Ig Nobel Chemistry Prize winner Theodore Gray writes: I thought some of you might like to see my write up of the events of the day Oliver Sacks came to visit my Periodic Table Table: ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-08 No Words We have been asked to comment on the existence of a publication named "The Digital Urology Journal" . We have declined. ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-09 The Anguish of Spaghetti, Revisited "Spaghetti" is the subject of INVESTIGATOR ADRIANO MELIS's note, published here last month. "Lengthy, tangled, and well worth chewing on" is not a bad way to describe the reaction that investigator Melis's note provoked in the scientific community. Melis was, perhaps in a too-hasty frenzy of scientific excitement, commenting on the report that appears at . Here is a sampling of the Melis-corrective commentary that is pouring in to our office: INVESTIGATOR R. DANCA: The researcher's statement that typical spaghetti take 30 seconds to cook is to me, a reasonably typical Italian specimen, simply astounding. Hand-made spaghetti takes about 30 seconds to cook. It's the dried stuff in the grocery store that takes 7 to 10 minutes. INVESTIGATOR M. DE CASTRO BASTOS: Looking at the original report, two things struck my attention: 1- The original report mentioned THAWING times for FROZEN spaghetti. Not the same as cooking time at all. 2- The original research was made in Japan, and the researchers were Japanese, but the report was made by Reuters, an Western news service. Some westerners have been known to mistake Japanese-style noodles (ramen) for true spaghetti. Maybe it was not spaghetti at all! ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-10 Knotted Anguish Anguish was evident, too, in notes we received from knot mathematicians who saw INVESTIGATOR JONATHAN ADAMS's note here last month about obscure journals. INVESTIGATOR Susan Williams summed the knot community's feelings: The Journal of Knot Theory and its Ramifications will never rise to the ranks of the outstandingly obscure unless it trims its 50-member editorial board. The journal's circulation must number at least 51, since each editor gets a free copy, and the University of South Alabama library has a paid subscription. ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-11 Shopping and the Brain There are people who will buy anything, and an organization called BrightHouse Institute for Thought Sciences says it wants to study these people's brains using functional magnetic imaging (fMRI). We wish them lots of luck. The BrightHouse Institute for Thought Sciences, by the way, is owned by an advertising agency, several of whose top employees have the official job title "Thinker." The tip of the iceberg can be seen at ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-12 Improbable Science Books Every holiday season we are inundated with books that people want us to review. Many of these books are both (a) funny and (b) about science -- but not at all in the way their authors apparently intended. Here are four OTHER recent books -- books that we enjoyed very, very much. "How to Dunk a Doughnut: The Science of Everyday Life," by Len Fisher, ISBN 0297607561. The 1999 Ig Nobel Physics Prize winner makes the scientific aspects of doughnut dunking as appetizing and satisfying as the dunking itself. He also makes a lot of other commonplace activities -- things you'd seldom hear mentioned in school -- more interesting than most things that do get discussed in classrooms. "Right Hand, Left Hand," by Chris McManus, ISBN 0297645978 and 0674009533. The 2002 Ig Nobel Medicine Prize winner gives a rollicking fingers-to-atoms explanation (with plenty of technical insight) of the biological wonder of handedness. "The Science of Harry Potter," by Roger Highfield. ISBN 0755311507 and 0670031534. This book, in a manner half-Hermionely, half Harryesque, takes an adventurously wise and clever look at how and why, with a scientific approach, one might go about pulling off at least some of Hermione and Harry's magical accomplishments. "The Ig Nobel Prizes," by Marc Abrahams, ISBN 0752851500. The in-depth, juicy, behind-the- scenes story of what, how, when, and (as much as possible) why most of the Ig Nobel Prize winners did what they did to earn their Prizes. [NOTE: we enjoyed writing this book, as well as reading it.] ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-13 Sheepish Thermodynamics Limerick Contest We invite you to enter the first and last annual SHEEPISH THERMODYNAMICS LIMERICK COMPETITION, for the best (NEWLY composed!) limerick that elucidates this research report, which was brought to our attention by investigator Tricia Rogerson: "Enthalpy, Heat Capacity and Thermal Conductivity of Boneless Mutton Between -40 and +40 Degrees C," Ana M. Tocci, Ethel S.E. Flores, and Rodolfo H. Mascheroni, Food Science and Technology / Lebensmittel-Wissen und-Technologie, vol. 30, no. 2, March 1997, pp. 184-91. RULES: Please make sure your rhymes actually do, and that your limerick at least pretends to adhere to classic limerick form. PRIZE: The winning author will receive a free, thermally conductive copy of an issue of the Annals of Improbable Research. Send entries (one entry per entrant) to: SHEEPISH THERMODYNAMICS LIMERICK CONTEST c/o ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-14 Season's Watery Greetings Jacques Benveniste, the only person who has been awarded two (2) Ig Nobel Prizes, recently sent us a big hello. You can see it at . Benveniste won his first prize for demonstrating, to his satisfaction, that water has the ability to remember things. His second prize was for demonstrating, with equal vigor, that these memories can be transmitted over telephone lines and the internet. ---------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-15 BURSTS OF HotAIR: Anti-Money Conference, etc. Here are concise, flighty mentions of some of the features we've posted on HotAIR since last month's mini-AIR came out. See the whole list by clicking "WHAT'S NEW" at the web site, or go to: ==> The Anti-Money Laundering Conference ==> New Additions to the List of Scholarly Romance Restaurants ==> Edison's Research on Nonverbal Communications ==> Edison's research on Human Topology THESE, AND MORE, ARE ON HOTAIR AT ----------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-16 RESEARCH SPOTLIGHT: Inevitable Breakthrough Each month we select for your special attention a research report that seems especially worth a close read. Your librarian will enjoy being asked (loudly, so other library patrons can hear it) for a copy. Here is this month's Pick of the Month: "Food and Drink Packaging: Who is Complaining and Who Should Be Complaining," Belinda Winder, Keith Ridgway, Amy Nelson, and James Baldwin, Applied Ergonomics, vol. 33, no. 5, September 2002, pp. 433-43.The authors, who are at the University of Sheffield, report that: Analyses on who suffered the most serious accidents and injuries whilst opening food and drink packaging revealed that the decision-making style of social resistance (that is, the extent to which you resist asking for help from others) was related to susceptibility to the most severe accidents.... [M]anufacturers of packaging should always look at a 'worst case scenario' for their packaging closures as it is evident that some people will continue to struggle with difficult packaging until either they open it or they have injured themselves. ----------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-17 MAY WE RECOMMEND: Flighty, Hopping and Fick ETIQUETTE AMONG THE FLIGHTY "Sister, Aunt-Niece, and Cousin Recognition by Social Wasps," G.J. Gamboa, Behavior Genetics, vol. 18, no. 4, July 1988, pp. 409-23. INFINITE CORRELATED HOPPING "Correlated Hopping in Infinite Dimensions: Rigorous Local Approach," A.M. Shvaika, (Thanks to Melissa Shreve for bringing this to our attention.) FICK: FOOD "On the Application of Fick's Law for the Kinetic Analysis of Air Drying of Foods," L. M. Vaccarezza and J. Chirife, Journal of Food Science, vol. 43, 1978, pp. 236-8. (Thanks to Fred Frank for bringing this to our attention.) ------------------------------------------------------------ 2002-12-18 AIRhead Events ==> For details and updates see ==> Want to host an event? 617-491-4437 NHK TELEVISION -- TUES, DEC. 24, 2002 9:15 p.m. Tokyo time. Special, festive Ig Nobel documentary prepared by, and broadcast on, the Japanese public television network. INFO: AAAS ANNUAL MEETING, DENVER --FRI EVENING, FEBRUARY 14, 2003 Special Annals of Improbable Research session at the Annual Meeting of the American Assn for the Advancement of Science. Featuring: * AIR Editor MARC ABRAHAMS * 2001 Ig Nobel Biology Prize winner BUCK WEIMER * 1994 Ig Nobel Medicine Prize co-winner RICHARD DART and others TBA MICHIGAN TECH, HOUGHTON, MI -- MON, APRIL 8, 2003 8:00 PM, Rozsa Center for the Performing Arts INFO: Valerie Pegg, vepegg@mtu.edu, 906-487-2844 -------------------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-19 How to Subscribe to AIR (*) Here's how to subscribe to the magnificent bi-monthly print journal The Annals of Improbable Research (the real thing, not just the little bits of overflow material you've been reading in this newsletter). ................................................................ Name: Address: Address: City and State: Zip or postal code: Country Phone: FAX: E-mail: ................................................................ SUBSCRIPTIONS (6 issues per year): USA 1 yr/$29 2 yrs/$53 Canada/Mexico 1 yr/$33 US 2 yrs/$57 US Overseas 1 yr/$45 US 2 yrs/$82 US ................................................................ BACK ISSUES are available, too: First issue: $8 USA, $11 Canada/Mex, $16 overseas Add'l issues purchased at same time: $6 each ................................................................ Send payment (US bank check, or international money order, or Visa, Mastercard or Discover info) to: Annals of Improbable Research (AIR) PO Box 380853, Cambridge, MA 02238 USA 617-491-4437 FAX:617-661-0927 ----------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-20 Our Address (*) Annals of Improbable Research (AIR) PO Box 380853, Cambridge, MA 02238 USA 617-491-4437 FAX:617-661-0927 EDITORIAL: marca@chem2.harvard.edu SUBSCRIPTIONS: air@improbable.com WEB SITE: --------------------------- 2002-12-21 Please Forward/Post This Issue! (*) Please distribute copies of mini-AIR (or excerpts!) wherever appropriate. The only limitations are: A) Please indicate that the material comes from mini-AIR. B) You may NOT distribute mini-AIR for commercial purposes. ------------- mini-AIRheads ------------- EDITOR: Marc Abrahams (marca@chem2.harvard.edu) MINI-PROOFREADER AND PICKER OF NITS (before we introduce the last few at the last moment): Wendy Mattson WWW EDITOR/GLOBAL VILLAGE IDIOT: Amy Gorin (airmaster@improbable.com) COMMUTATIVE EDITOR: Stanley Eigen (eigen@neu.edu) ASSOCIATIVE EDITOR: Mark Dionne DISTRIBUTIVE EDITOR: Robin Pearce CO-CONSPIRATORS: Alice Shirrell Kaswell, Gary Dryfoos, Ernest Ersatz, S. Drew MAITRE DE COMPUTATION: Jerry Lotto AUTHORITY FIGURES: Nobel Laureates Dudley Herschbach, Sheldon Glashow, William Lipscomb, Richard Roberts (c) copyright 2002, Annals of Improbable Research ----------------------------------------------------- 2002-12-22 How to Receive mini-AIR, etc. (*) What you are reading right now is mini-AIR. Mini-AIR is a (free!) tiny monthly *supplement* to the bi-monthly print magazine. To subscribe, send a brief E-mail message to: LISTPROC@AIR.HARVARD.EDU The body of your message should contain ONLY the words SUBSCRIBE MINI-AIR MARIE CURIE (You may substitute your own name for that of Madame Curie.) ---------------------------- To stop subscribing, send the following message: SIGNOFF MINI-AIR ============================================================