October 2, 1999
Truly tea-dious
British standards watchdogs were yesterday
unmasked as the world's top
wafflers after producing a 5,000-word guide to making
an ordinary cup of tea.
The British Standards Institute beat a host
of wordy opponents to win one of
10 Ig Nobels - a US spoof on the Nobel prizes for scientific
and artistic
excellence announced on Thursday.
A panel of Harvard University academics unveiled
the snappily-titled BS 6008:
Method for Preparation of a Liquor of Tea for Use in
Sensory Tests as its
unanimous choice for the literary award at a parallel
ceremony in Massachusetts.
The six-page work, which lays out in mind-boggling
detail how to brew the
definitive British cuppa, was selected after meeting
the key Ig Nobel criteria
of being a feat that "cannot or should not be reproduced".
Here is an abridged
version of the text:
Use 2g of tea - to a margin of error
of plus or minus 2pc - for every 100ml
of water.
Tea flavour and appearance will be
affected by the hardness of the water
used.
The pot must be filled to within 4-6mm
of the brim with freshly boiling
water.
After the lid has been placed on top,
the pot must be left to brew for
precisely six minutes.
Milk should be added at a ratio of 1.75ml of milk for every 100ml of tea.
The pot should be lifted with the lid
held in place, then "pour tea through
the infused leaves into the cup".
Pour in tea on top of milk to prevent
scalding the milk. If you pour your
milk in last the best results are with a liquor temperature
of 65-80C.